A New Courage

Fear. It paralyses. It makes you sit on the sofa and sob. While watching reality shows.

Or it can cause you to "fight or flight" as in "Hey, there's a lion. He's licking his chops and walking towards me....RUN!!!!!"

Four years ago my body lost the ability to automatically "fight or flight." I cannot handle even the stress of an illness like gastro or minor oral surgery without taking additional replacement hormones called hydrocortisone. It translates into Cortisol, a hormone normally produced under orders of the pituitary gland. Mine is a withered piece of useless tissue and all my pituitary-ordered hormones must be replaced via medication.


Physically, I'm capable of functioning on the supplements, but I've had this mental aversion to risks since the surgery. I have been gripped by a single fear.

What if my body can't respond to the stress caused by life?

Before my diagnosis, I had a list of 50 things I wanted to do before my 50th birthday. I still managed to achieve half of a slightly modified list, most of which was planned before my surgery. But since then? Nothing. Nada. Zilch. Nyet. Sure I started a company, closed it, became a full-time employee. All things to continue my existence, not enhance it.

In 2013, I revisited an exercise I'd forgotten about: the Franklin Covey Personal Mission Statement.  

I'd last completed this around 2007.  My life had changed significantly since then, and it was time for an update.

I completed this exercise, and then BAM! Another significant life change. The break-up of a long-term relationship.

These things happen in life. But for me, it was back to the sofa with ice cream and all seven seasons of the Gilmore Girls.

An invitation to participate in a medical trial gave me a surge of optimism, but was followed quickly by losing three friends gone-too-soon, and a medical emergency at home.

The biggest positives have been my career, and after 2 and a half years, I've purchased my first property in Australia. And of course the ever-present support of friends.

So now what? Now it's time to swing back into action. I've discovered Franklin Covey's The 5 Choices and plan on using these to implement Operation: No Fear.

For the next week I will operate without fear to work through my "Big Rocks". If these outcomes are successful, and there is little doubt they will be, I will be in the position to further achieve things that are important to me.

I'll keep you posted!